Dear Bloggers: You Have an Expiration Date
BlogHer '09 In Real Life.
This year it was all about bringing the Blogging Community together In Real Life. But in reality do you want to be brought into Greed, Lust, Jealousy, Anger, Hurt, Stress, and Exhaustion? Are you ready to subject your passion of writing and blogging by presenting it to "Real" Women who just tear it up, throw it down, and step over it as they rush frantically to the next bag of free crap?!
I hate to start my BlogHer Re-Cap in such a negative tone, but I have never been so disappointed in fellow bloggers, than I was this past weekend. From women hoarding Swag Bags to bloggers who didn't hold up their end of the bargain, I experienced a WHOLE lot of negativity. This brought me to the point of hanging the phone up and yelling at the blogger who had the NERVE to call my room and make demands regarding a sponsorship partnership they did half ass at anyway. Seriously, if you greedily take the sponsorship and refuse to even talk to those who granted it to you or do work involved, then you have jump started the process of a blogging-gone-bad career, fine until you open the cap and realize how curdled and horribly potent you really are.
These "ladies", whom present themselves so poorly, brought only one thought to my head:
It was overheard that a very influential woman in the social media/blogging realm, had enough and made plans to tell "Half Ass Blogger" how much she's messing up her life by her actions online and in Real Life.
She has passed her Blog Expiration Date.
Some bloggers who reach that particular "Must Use Before" date because they lose their sense of pride and forget their worth as a writer and a parent. There was one particular phrase I read on twitter while I waited at the airport that read: It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
Manners women. Were you taught simple etiquette and manners? Did you have a role model in your life that showed you how to treat people and how to hold yourself with integrity in public? It's a simple concept that most women, so I thought, knew.
If you're not a blogger who falls under the the above category, then you might be a blogger like me. I'll call myself a "Mid-Mommy Crisis Blogger".
That's right.
Four men at BlogHer: Avitable, Childsplayx2, BusyDad and Backpacking Dad (whom I had the chance to interview and chat with) actually influenced me to come out of my shell as a blogger. I'm positive they don't know it, but the confidence they showed gleamed throughout the room as they never veered from the reason why they blog: Humor, Children, Parenting, Relaxation and, most importantly, the Passion of writing!
Men visit their online home-away-from-home to relax, to laugh, to meet new blogs, laugh at their friends, and write that kick ass post that's been circling their heads all day. They consist of such a small niche (men bloggers) but they know their audience, blogging the subjects that happen to inspire them that particular day and not caring about stats.
Take me for instance, my blog WREAKS of that "Pre-School, Christian, Mom Blog". Don't get me wrong! I AM a Christian. I AM a Mom and I DO have young children, however, I'm not going to be that forever. My kids will grow up, I'll have forgotten the "Sippy Cup" stage and I'll be left with a preschool blog whom I can't even relate to anymore. I'll hide on my MacBook and hope she doesn't find me being that all our memories together were created on Windows XP.
All in flash of an hour, I saw my blog expiration date virtually stamped on my forehead reading: "PLEASE CHANGE OR FREEZE YOUR WRITING BY 08-01-09"
I want to write about the guy and girl flirting in the row in front of me on my flight home, although ,I overheard they were married to other people. I want to write about how ANGRY it made me and how it brought painful memories back of the affairs throughout my marriage.
I want to write about how some bloggers have hurt me and made me so angry I cursed as I hung the phone up on them, then cried on the shoulder of sweet girls who know all too well.
I want to write about the jealousy I felt when seeing beautiful tiny bloggers then cringing as I looked in the mirror at myself, overweight and feeling like this:
I want to write about Controversies, News, Social Media, Christianity, Parenting, and REAL LIFE. The REAL LIFE I experience every day as a Blogger, Writer, Mother, and Wife.
My blogging expiration date HAS arrived for My Sippy Cup Runneth Over and Momma Findings, but instead of pouring it down the sink and throwing it out, I'm making big changes, starting over, and really letting you into the epitome of a "Blogger in Real Life"
My confidence? I'm glad it looked good on the outside, because I was nervous as hell!
There were definitely some negative aspects of BlogHer, but the positive experiences I had with the bloggers I met far outweighed anything else. I'm looking forward to next year!
OMGosh Avitable commented on your blog, you ARE A ROCKSTAR lol. I adore this post, so much I want to say and I just may do so in my Tuesday Tidbits later on. I am so glad I had wonderful people to surround myself with. You are such a wonderful and beautiful person and I am lucky to call you friend.
And I totally agree with avitable, the positives definitely outweigh the negatives for me too :)
How terrible that some bloggers will stoop to that level! I am so glad that you have decided to rally against all the negativity and go forward and be positive! Yay for you! You can't change other people, but you can change how you react to them!
Wow! That's a lot of negativity to go through and process at what I assume is supposed to be a very positive venue for bloggers to come together and celebrate what they do. I've never been to Blogher, and I'm sorry it didn't turn out to be what it should've been for you. Thanks for sharing this.. it was nice to meet you via SITs.
Wow. I'm humbled that you took something so positive from our panel. Blogging is such a personal thing and I'm glad you're trying to find your audience and your voice.
And, at the risk of being an stereotypical guy, you look so much better than Mrs. PotatoHead. Really.
I love you Sara! :) Look at the guts you came home with!!! I think we've all come home with the same feelings and frustration and anger. But hanging with you awesome ladies at BlogHer made the trip through hell well worth it. You're awesome and gorgeous in spite of what you think.
Great post! I think that with anything like that (Blogher) there's always positives and negatives. I'm looking forward to what you have in store for your blog!
Sorry you had such a bad experience at BlogHer. I'm your 90th Follower! Stopping over from SITS. Stop by, I post marital secrets for young wives, mothers, and couples.
Just adding myself as a follwer now.
Your honesty, was refreshing!!
Looking forward to reading more about you (and honestly, you don't look anything like Mrs. Potatoe Head)
You're a such a cutie, inside and out, Sara! You know I love you and it's good to see you be able to come out of a bad situation with such a positive outlook! I love reading what you write and I'm glad you're not throwing in the towel!
There was definitely some darkness at BlogHer but I was thrilled to find out the people that I felt the closest to online were exactly who I thought they were in Real Life. The ones who turned out to be snobs/jerks/greedy...well I'm disappointed but also glad to know what THEY are like In Real Life too.
I'm undecided about NYC, but maybe I will be there.
It did work to help you improve your blog vision, so that is a total win!
I wasn't there but I can tell you as a guy and dad blogger it some times feels like I am playing in the mom's sandbox and they hate me. So what do I do, I say eff it and play away. I build my own sand castles (blog posts) and have fun doing it. Glad to hear you had a good time and sorry you had some bad times, had a blast "chatting with you all weekend."
Buck
This is the first time I have EVER read anything bad about blogher - I am a casual at best blogger so going to blogher is not even in my world - I have to guess that you can't be the only person who has ever had a less then perfect time and I honestly admire you for posting this - you go girl!!!
Good for you! Even though your Blogher experience was a little less than what you had hoped for, and it's sad that you had to see the ugly side of some bloggers, at least you gained something huge: confidence! I wish I could say that I feel confident in a room full of bloggers or writers (or even moms). I didn't go to Blogher and I was all jealous and bitter about it, but then I started thinking about it and I'm not sure I even want to go next year. Not b/c of sucky people (since there are plenty of those right here in my real life world), more b/c I'm afraid I'll be the sucky person. At least you don't have to worry about that:)!
I stopped by via wordless wednesday, but got totally wrapped up in this post instead...LOVED IT!
I think it's great that you took so much from the experience and get a makeover to boot...yay for you!
Great post girlfriend!
I love this post Sara! As a blogger of a little over 2 years, but more frequently this year, I want to go to BlogHer next year and I hope that the things that took place last week won't happen again. I've heard such bad things (until now) that it leaves me a little jaded.
Thanks for sharing!
You rock, my sweet friend! That's all =)